<Sweet Source>

Words in Ripples...

...a destiny of streams, a reality of rivers, a hope for oceans, but a vision of seas...

Saturday, April 02, 2005

What's the future gonna be?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm dreamin just for the hell of dreaming. Since I was 7 I wanted to be a doctor just like Ben Carson, and all kids have that dream career but this dream never left my heart, medicine was all I ever wanted to do-yea my brothers and mother say I can argue like a great lawyer and now some people are telling me to preach but still medicine is what I wanna do. The strain I feel in my soul when I see someone aching, sick, and in pain tells me that a doctor is in my spirit...But this school work is bustin my behind something serious. I didn't think it would be easy but I didn't think it would be this hard either. It's like I can't get things the first time around and when I do get somethings I forget soon after the test is done {and that's definately not me!!!} Sometimes I think because the course load has nothing to do with taking care of sick people then I don't care and lose interest really quick. This past year has proven to me that I am definately kept here for a reason, Lord I need you to let me know...twice I have been threaten in my school work but I've never lost my determination to make-MD or Bust! I put my all in the work but then I have to check myself because I allow other thoughts to take over my mind's time.
I've never been one of them females that stressed guys too tough, I'm normally the chick to crack on them chicks that made themselves look so stupid stressin some ass that wasn't worth it, but now there's this one...I can't shake him for NOTHING!!! Neither of us need to be in a serious realtionship but something in both of us won't let us stop playin with the idea when it comes to one another, and it stresses me. What if he is the one? What if he ain't and I'm waisting my time? Why cant I shake this fool like I do the others? Why can't he shake me??? If he is the one, why aren't we just put together? and if he ain't the one, why can't he just become a memory that never replays itself? See all these questions get into my head and leaves me asking Why didn't I do this paper better? Why didn't I start studyin for that test earlier? Why did I get that grade?
Lemme get back to this work b4 I start askin more questions...I'll be back with more I'm sure
Dr. CH, MD

posted by DSweet1 @ Saturday, April 02, 2005

0 Comments: