<Sweet Source>

Words in Ripples...

...a destiny of streams, a reality of rivers, a hope for oceans, but a vision of seas...

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Tonight, I cried...

I really enjoyed my weekend, I went to 2 birthday parties and celebrated with friends all weekend! I was a lil upset that I didn't get to go to the NeYo showcase in NY with my NY crew but the parties made up for it. Suede was really nice and Old City has a vibe similar to SoHo so I was in my element...My homeboy came from Brooklyn to chill with me this weekend and we got to "understand" a little more about each other and that was really nice. When it got close to the time for him to leave, I started to feel a little melancholy and it wasn't because he was leavin but because I began to think over what needed to be done this week and how all that would affect the weeks ahead of me and inevitably my future-in other words I started thinkin too much.
We went to a poetry reading at Zanzibar Blue and I was really inspired by it but it also inspired me to think again, when he actually left I went for a walk. As I walked along voided avenues I was left alone to my subconscious and I realized that while it all makes sense in your head, you cannot force someone to swallow their own purpose if they're not ready and I can't ask for a blessing and do nothing to see it through and when I thought of how much I allowed myself to go through because I didn't/refused to realize some of this before all I could do was allow the tears to tell God everything I didn't want to admit out loud, right there in those voided streets...
Sometimes I just wished that I did everything I know I'm supposed to do and the story line I've created for my life in my mind just panned out the way I wrote it...but God knows best so really I can't complain.

Dr. CH {prayerfully}

posted by DSweet1 @ Sunday, January 08, 2006

2 Comments:

At 1:38 PM, Anonymous said…

Sometimes tears are neccesary, especially with someone like you who NEVER cries and always takes care of everybody else's pain...you've been one of the few people I could really call a "Christian" and you've always managed to pull through things with such gangsta and grace, a true lady ;-) Keep ya head up ma, NY loves you
At 1:40 PM, Anonymous said…

awww Cs, I'm tellin you its that Philly air, everything's great when you're in Bk and then you go back to that miserable city and look what happens to ya. BRING YA ASS HOME NIGGA!!!
LOL LOVE YA SIS