| Sunday, August 21, 2005 |
| Purpose??? |
You ever wonder what you're doing here??? When you're 70 and you go over your life, will all the questions be answered or will some things still make no sense? Ever wonder what the focus of your eulogy will be? Every wonder, What will they say about you as they close your casket? I DO!
It might sound a lil funny but right now I'm mad with God. I love Him with all my heart, this fact was never a secret, but His moves in my life make NO SENSE!!! Now I've seen Him move and do some things in my life that I've defined years after it's happened, but lately these moves, REALLY make no sense...
He sends me to Drexel to get a degree in BioChem and my main concern should be getting As and Bs in my classes and I really haven't done that...I'll try to be focused and study and in the midst of studying something will come to mind andI'll go straight to the Bible and He'll speak to me when I go and these lil sermonettes come out on 3-4 pages, but FOR WHAT??? I'm not a preacher, I'm not delivering any of these messages anywhere to anyone, some don't really apply to me-so why am I locked into this that is not my future and not BioChem which will get me there??? These messages are not really saving lives or helping anybody, some I don't tell anybody because they might not get it, so WHY IS HE TELLING ME THIS??
He introduces me to some people whom at first glance seem strong and steadfast, people that I can really connect with and even lean on...I'll get close to these people and in the midst of the friendships some craziness is revealed to me and then I find myself stuck trying to figure out their problems because I can't be normal and know the difference between my friend's problems and my own. Now I've always wished for people who were just honest and open with me because while I'm not really a' cry your eyes' out type of person, someone that can be honest about the way they think and feel will do so much better than someone who acts and think they way they THINK they should act/think around me...Do I really need these aggrevations???
I didn't do that well on my last set of midterms and my GPA is at risk and for that, Lord I'm upset...I've prayed for focus and steadfastness and yet I put in the work to study and my mind travels left field. Don't get me wrong, I've always loved the Word of God but why am I so into it and it's not reallya part of my purpose??? There's a word...Father, What is My Purpose??? I thought I knew...
CH |
posted by DSweet1 @ Sunday, August 21, 2005  |
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| 1 Comments: |
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While it was a lil harsh, J was right! You can't hurry what God is working on "he doesn't work on our time" {you taught me that! :-)} So if you get this sermonettes write em, post them here, we're all reading and I'm sure alot of people are reading but just don't leave responses. You have helped me see things in a different light and He will never let you fail if you're doing His work-YOU'RE GPA WILL BE FINE!!!
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Name: DSweet1
Home: Philly by way of BROOKLYN, NYC/PA, United States
About Me: A newlywed/new mom starting a brand new chapter in life and determined to make life the most it can be from here on out!
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While it was a lil harsh, J was right! You can't hurry what God is working on "he doesn't work on our time" {you taught me that! :-)} So if you get this sermonettes write em, post them here, we're all reading and I'm sure alot of people are reading but just don't leave responses. You have helped me see things in a different light and He will never let you fail if you're doing His work-YOU'RE GPA WILL BE FINE!!!