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Words in Ripples...

...a destiny of streams, a reality of rivers, a hope for oceans, but a vision of seas...

Friday, March 10, 2006

Heaven or Hell???

I'm ripped between the two parts of me and I'm pissed at myself about it...The Christ in me is pissed at me for allowing the flesh part of me to put up a serious battle. I know better, I'm a teacher of the Word!!!I tell people they know better so do better, and before I do my stupidity I tell myself I know better but in the heat of everything, my flesh wins out. For a moment I'm ok with it but then I beat myself up for being so stupid!!!
This morning I laid my friend, Anna, to rest and it made me realize that any minute now I could be gone or a loved one could leave me and I need to make sure that I live a life that, should I pass away people, other than my family, will say 'She helped me in this way', 'I know for sure she loved me' I would love people to remember that I loved, and I loved hard, I loved strong, and I loved real...
There are some things I know I need to do and of course late at night, I can hear the Lord telling me that I'm off, I can truly hear Him say that I need to fix some things but the flesh is scared that it'll blow up in my face and I will no longer be able to live comfortably or people won't view me the same way. But how long can one disobey a sovereign, all knowing God? The fact that He reprimands, shows He loves so why rebuff the love and burn for eternity??? I gotta make my moves and since His ways are higher than my ways, I'll turn it all over and let it be what He will...I needed to get that out, I'm gonna go get some work done.

Dr. CH, MD {prayerfully}

posted by DSweet1 @ Friday, March 10, 2006

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